26 balloons

Children should outlive their parents. It's the natural order of things.

Childhood blossoms into youthful vigor, and then slowly declines into those peaceful sunset years. Then death.

We humans, as a collective, have come to terms with the inevitability of death. Following the death of his mother, Times Union editor Bill Federman observed:

I recently attended a funeral for a 26 year old. Not many years before, my family attended the funeral for a college-age girl - Maddy.

And now, I mourn with another friend over the death of her only child. That a child should die before a parent is out of place and time. It's the unnatural order of things. Disturbing. Heart wrenching.

There's a season for everything. That's a biblical principle. Even a time to cry and a time to grieve.* It's also a biblical admonishment to weep with those who weep. Sure, weeping won't last forever. Joy will come. But when someone is grieving, we enter into that season with them. Here are 5 practical ways you can do that, from HelpGuide.

1) Reach out to the person who as suffered loss. You might not know what to say - but don't let that stop you from connecting with them. Sometimes you don't need to say anything except "I heard about your loved one's death. And I'm so sorry."

2) Let them talk about their loved one. They might repeat themselves. It's okay. It helps them process the loss.

3) Be there. It's okay to sit in silence. And it's okay to cry. And it's okay to admit you don't know how to be of best help.

4) Do practical stuff. They might need you to shop for groceries or prepare meals for them. They might need you to mow their lawn or clean their house or walk their dog.

5) Be in it for the long haul. Grieving doesn't have a timeline. Some might accept their loss after a year or two. Others will grieve for years. Each journey is unique.

At the funeral, relatives carried 26 balloons - one for each year of life - behind the casket and released them to the sky as it was loaded into the hearse. You might not agree with what they did. But they weren't asking. She had loved helium balloons.

When death happens, as we know it will, enter the shadows with those you love. Because you care. Support, because they need it. Listen, because it's not the time to admonish or enter into theological or philosophical debate. Weep. Because no one should walk the grief journey alone.

* Ecclesiastes 3:1 and 4; Romans 12:5